Here I Am Alive

I don’t feel that this is my responsibility.

It’s not really my place to explain my conduct or life choices to those who continue to make assumptions based upon false facts they have created within their mind because of things they see on social media. This is 2015 and we aren’t teenagers; we are adults in this world and it causes a slight shiver to coarse through my body when we fail to act as such.

My life is my life. My actions, decisions and subsequent consequences? Those are mine as well.

I don’t view my passions as anyones problem but my own, however, I do admit I find it necessary to remark and clarify when people decide to view me as something I am not. Again, I strongly feel it’s not my duty to help others clear up the fiction they have construed, especially when those who have done so don’t know ME.

Sadly, though, this is something that has to be done. I will tell you this post and my “explanation of my actions” is not meant to be harsh or personal, it’s simply the truth.

I am not Instagram, I am not Facebook, I am not Twitter, no more than I am Crohn’s. I don’t believe in letting those things define me and it’s unfortunate that others have let it define their impression of my individual character.

What am I then?

I’m an almost 28 year old who is proud of her body, even after the (literal) shit it’s been put through. To me, that means participating at times in photoshoots with outcomes that others may deem uncomfortable. I understand that you may not endorse these photos and quite frankly, I don’t expect you to. But while you may not accept “it”, I do expect you to accept me.

It means focusing my time and energy on traveling whenever and wherever I can, as often as I have the opportunity. This burn and drive I have to see it all comes from the my life experiences that most may not fully comprehend, and that’s alright. For my part, however, I don’t want to miss a thing in this world and the experiences it has to offer.

It means taking the time to write about the things I love and places I’ve seen and putting characters and stories to paper that have been in my head for years. Whether or not others read them or anything gets published isn’t the point; so long as I get it down and never doubt my truth or myself, then for me, that’s the important part.

It means altering my mentality to be the type of person who has fully accepted themselves enough to know that not all is as it seems; there is always the truth and until that has manifested itself to me, than my mind shall remain open, always. My relationships with my parents, my significant other, my friends, my family and even those I have just met are known to me and so long as that respect and love is returned and known to all parties involved, then there is no excuse for others to meddle.

In the end, what matters is knowing who you are and whether you are secure enough to love not just the other incredible souls you meet in this universe but yourself as well. Don’t judge those you don’t know simply because you don’t understand.

We are all more than these trivial things that play a part in our lives – we are humans. Live the positive and exhale the illusions you allow to control you. Get to know someone, REALLY know them. Don’t ask them about what band they like or food the enjoy, ask them about their drive and passions, fears and loves. Change the status quo and search inside them and yourself before you make a final decision on them and their character.

Only then will you truly understand life and the world we are in.

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